As Told By Genesis

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“If the Eiffel Tower were now representing the world’s age, the skin of paint on the pinnacle-knob at its summit would represent man’s share of that age; and anybody would perceive that the skin was what the tower was built for. I reckon they would.”- David Christian

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inthebeginningHeyGod has always been. But when God reached a certain point in his consciousness, he expanded and created the world.

Here is a picture of the world as we know it:

theworld

God created the earth in 7 days.

7days

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So God created light.

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Here’s how it did it:

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Then God realized that he needed to separate light from darkness.

Here’s what he called them:

daynight

God soon became bored with just the night and day, so he went to bed and dreamed of what he would create during day 2 of creation.

shit

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2

God awoke from slumber and got straight to work.

On day 2 of creation, God created the sky and the sea.

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God swam all day and all night and soon got tired from exercising, so he moved onto day 3.

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3

God was tired after swimming all day and all night, and so he created land.

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During day 3, God finally became hungry.

He then created vegetation.

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On day 4, God got a little more intricate with things.

He created the sun.

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He created the stars too.

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The last thing God did on day 4 was create the moon.

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God wants everyone (especially the hippies) to know this:

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And that is just what God did on day 4.

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On day 5, God just created birds and marine life.

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On Day 6, God created the reason for the creation of the world:

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God gave the humans permission to rule over all other organisms. He told them to procreate as much as possible so that humans could dominate all of life.

On this day, God also created animals.

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And so then God reacted by declaring this to mankind:

permission

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One comment

  1. I always thought Genesis was a band.
    A delightful romp through a more likely scenario than what we grew up with…
    And if we are all products of our upbringing does that mean…

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